Category: Let's talk
To be honest I'm not sure what the point really of this post is, or even what board it belongs in; I considered the rant board, but I'm not so sure.
I've been thinking about some issues raised in other topics, issues concerning stereotypical blind people, and the thought that "one represents all" is damaging and is the wrong way to look at things. After all, who cares what blind Amy does, as long as she lives her life? It doesn't (and shouldn't) influence me ... and I shouldn't feel represented by her actions, or try and influence her If she's not really harming me .. or is she?
I live in a metro in the United States with well over a million people. There's a popular radio station here, with an even more popular morning show that just about everyone I know listens to at some point; trust me, it's really quite a staple in the market. They hire interns, and it's time for the batch of summer interns to come in.
today was the first day. One of them was a blind student.
The show was all sorts of special, special in every bad way possible. the intern was nicknamed "Little Ray," and from there things just got worse. I'm trying to keep some sense of anonymity here for everyone, so I won't include download links to the audio or anything. The intern claimed on air that he could tell If a girl was attractive by the feel of her elbow (?) and it just went downhill from there. Subsequently, the hosts had him feel various people's elbows, faces, and breasts in the case of one host, tell If they were attractive, and the entire thing was so cringe-worthy. One woman called in and said that, blind or not, she would be glad to slap him in part for comments he made about gay and colored people.
Hey, it's great that he got an internship. he's doing something besides sitting at home on his ass all day. Obviously he's got some ambition and he's doing something about it. good for him.
And, it's morning radio. They make fun of people all the time. To be honest, this is quite normal; the fact that a blind person is on and (in my opinion, making an absolute fool out of himself) really isn't that special or noteworthy. It probably means nothing in the end.
So why the hell does it bother me so much?
Brice
I think that this situation bothers you because you know that sighted people are stereotypical and one representative is enough to set the standard or norm for an entire group of people. Even though you know that this isn't right, and you don't think it should affect you, you know that it just might.
Oh, and just to clear things up if there's any fog, I'm not saying that all sighted people are stereotypical, nor am I saying that there aren't any stereotypical blind or impaired or handicapped people. But people who have no impairment, disability, or handicap are more likely to be the most ignorant about people with certain impairments, so they are quick to jump to conclusions and make assumptions. And since those are the types of people that run most things, we know that if they happen to encounter a bad representative of any group of people, this may be detrimental or frustrating for any other person coming from that particular group.
Certainly. that's the problem; I think, somewhat unconciously, I'm afraid that someone will see me, and exclaim "Oh, yeah, you're like that weird creepy blind person I heard on the radio that summer" without ever speaking or getting to know me.
I cringe when I hear the audio; I cringe when I think about it.
But worst of all, I hate the fact that I care so much and that I'm actually letting it bother me.
Brice
Damnit, I had an excellent post all written up, and then the browser decided to have a hickup. Let's see if I can recreate it.
I think this is something we all struggle with as blind people, and probably anyone else that has a significant stereotype attached to them, for whatever reason. Let's take the question one step furtther. How often do you let what the public sighted world affect what you wil or won't do? Do you think it's right to say "screw'em, if they make a judgement about me as an individual, and apply it to all blind people, that's their problem?" or there's the opposite of "I'm not going to do this or that, (or I am going to do this or that), because it's what's expected of me as a blind person, or because the sighted world would just use that to add to the stereotype?" (the version of that I wrote up last attempt was so much better. But I don't remember the wording. I think you'll understand what I'm getting at however.)
For myself I'm more inclined to lean towards the former. I believe we're all individuals, and if someone chooses to make an inaccurate assumption about an entire population subgroup it's because their thinking is fundamentally flawed, as every person, blind sighted, or what have you, is an individual person. However, that viewpoint is very easy to say, not always easy to do, and even I, in my most honest moments, would say that sometimes it's inappropriate, or can feel that way. There's a reason they talked about peer pressure so much when we were in school (I assume this is still the case.) Even for those of us who weren't, and didn't want to be, part of the "popular croud" we still cared, at least on some leverl, whether it was conscious or not.
I'll be interested to hear what everyone else thinks.
Well, I guess I'm a little of both. I could give a shit less about what people think of my abilities as an individual, but I try not to do things in my day-to-day life that would feed the public stereotype of blind people. Even in public, I won't go out of my way to try to reason with closed minds, but you'd better believe that if I'm ever in a situation where I feel I've been discriminated against because of someone's ignorance, I'll fight like hell.
But wow, until you explained that this particular morning show regularly makes fun of people, I was wondering why the hell they would humor this guy. That's pathetic.
Becky
Brice, I know exactly why this bothers you. It's easy to say that it shouldn't, and maybe you're right, but it would bother me, too. I think Digressive Distortion put it best. The next time one of us walks into a potential employer's office for an interview, it could be that guy on the morning show that's in their minds when they decide if they want to hire one of us. It's easy to say we don't care, or shouldn't care, what others think of us, but sometimes it does matter.
As I read this whole thing, I was cringing in embarrassment for you and most importantly for the poor guy who is the intern. No one has ever thought that maybe he wants this job really really bad, and figures "hey I'll put up with the shi* to get the knowledge." Hey it could be argued that where is his pride, but that doesn't pay the rent or the tuition to college.
maybe he has had no other contact with blind people. if this is the way he was interacted with all his life, maybe it is normal to him.
Did it ever occur to you that the guy may be a real jackass and they had to hire him? Perhaps the hosts felt uncomfortable and being naturally lazy took the easy way out. Remember sex and sleeze are the mainstays of morning drive time shows.
Maybe this guy doesn't have any interests and/or hobbies or whatever that are broadcast worthy. Say he loves to i don't know program in c plus or something.....
What kinds of stuff were they picking on the other interns about? Did they even have a part in the show?
The sad thing is that relying on these stereotypes means that this intern's stint won't have legs so to speak. Once those subjects are exhausted, if he doesn't have anything else to contribute that is crude or funny, then this poor guy is toast. Just stick a fork in him. He'll be out of there.
The thing that upsets me even more than this dude's sexist and stupid performance is the fact that some women let him touch their breast. Hey, Gals, where is your pride?
Finally and most importantly, Would you necessarily want to associate with and/or work for an ignorant closed minded person? Most people are aware that these shows are not reality. If they are going to judge you on the slimey behavior of some egotistical drive time hosts and a dumb intern, perhaps they are not the best person to know or be employed by.
The thing is, this is a morning radio show that it seems to me, goes for the shock value and the low blow for laughs. Yeah, I cringed, but I also think that if people are going to listen to some radio show and get their impressions of the real world from it, then it's just too bad for them. They probably didn't come away with any new beliefs that they didn't have already, because part of shock humor is about laughing at those folks considered outside of normal, as in fat, ugly, kinky, perverted, blind, mentally ill, disabled, gay, just anyone not considered normal and ordinary.
As for me, all I can be is myself, which may mean I'm a bad representative of all blind people, but I personally cannot bear that on my shoulders and the assorted guilt and shame that goes with it. I will do my best in public to be nice to folks and not act like a jerk or a dufus or look like somebody that lives in a box in the park. But I'm not going to try too hard or be all artificial about myself. If people are going to see their own misconceptions instead of the reality of me, that's too bad for them. I'm not a perfectionist, and I don't think perfectionism will batter down misconceptions anyhow. Some folks will get it and some folks won't, and most sighted people will never understand what it's like to be blind and there's no way I can tell them. They'd have to be there.
Interesting topic. I have a question though. Does anyone else besides me get sick of hearing how anyone with any disability has a more open heart, is more tolerant, and is less judgmental than the rest of society? I work for an agency where up until about two weeks ago, I accompanied case managers on home visits. I work for the housing authority, and the clients we serve are need of much more than housing in many cases. While it's true, I may not see a pot plant growing in the corner, or a bruised on a woman's face from her abusive husband, I am stilll "judgmental" in the sense that I have had to deal with individuals who are not using their full potential as society has defined it. I can tell you, that looks do matter to me in potential boyfriends. There are certainly behaviors I consider unacceptable just like the rest of the world. Yes, I consider myself to be a very nice and decent person, just like the majority of people I've met. But I get really peeved when I'm placed on a pedestal. As far as the intern, I hope he won't face any ramifications from his comments or behavior. Even if it's a morning show, where things can get a bit sleazy, potential employers do look at one's past employment record. Was this guy making blind jokes because he felt like he needed to? I can understand why the original poster was bothered. Like it or not, it seems as if one blind person sets the standard (at least in some sighted peoples' minds) for how the rest of us behave and act.
Up until recently, I used to dislike it when people thought of me as amazing or otherwise tended to make more out of me than I thought of myself. But I've come to realize that I suppose it's better than people thinking I'm subhuman or an idiot or worthless. As for being non-judgmental, although I think some of it comes from my blindness, I've just decided to not be judgmental just as a person or at least to try my best not to. First, I'd hate to be judged as harshly as I might judge others, so I'm trying to treat others the way I want to be treated. Next, it just seems like a waste of time because no matter waht I or others think, people are just going to do what they're going to do anyhow, and ya can't fix 'em. But, I'm not angelic or pure or even psychic! LOL!
godzilla, i totally agree with you. also, the amazing thing comes from the person trying to put themselves in our shoes and not having enough imagination to see how we do things. it doesn't mean to me that they think we are less, they just can't see how they'd do what we do. does that make sense?
Oh absolutely, oh yeah! One thing it's taken a bit for me to realize is that although you can try to reassure people and offer up anecdotes, people may never really understand what it's like to be blind with the fullness that a blind person does. It's like somebody asking you what it's like to be blind and your answer would be, "you kind of have to be there." Now I tend to take the whole bit about me being amazing and run with it. For example, I have a blog on Livejournal, and my current title for it is "The Adventures of Amazing Me." LOL, and honestly I'm not necessarily a very amazing person. Eccentric, yes, a square peg of sorts, yes, but amazing? I don't know.
I think that it is because there are many more people with out physical handicap's. Then there are with. So when people look at a blind person doing something that most would consider them not capable of doing they are somewhat taken aback bye it. It could happen to any regular person with a handicap. Just because the radio people don't know how we do most things. As for that radio show I think that as one poster said above most of those morning radio show just are there for laughs and they will present anything or anyone that is even slightly weird. If regular people want to take though's ideas from that radio show let them . There are now so many movies of amazing blind people anyway. The least we can do is kerikted them and let them form there own ideas of blind people.
here's a thought my mom always told me as a kid. Everyone has a handicap, or i guess today we say disability. Some people's are more obvious than are other's. for example, my stepmom has a serious heart condition. my husband's good friend keith gets all outraged because some people use the handicapped parking spaces. my stepmom would be one of those to make his blood pressure soar. the fact that although she looks as normal as you or I but can't walk more then 50 feet without gasping for breath doesn't fit in to his equasion i guess. I think the whole "you are amazing" thing is largely due to a lack of imagination. When I meet people, I try to put myself in their position and imagine how I'd live their life. I watch a show on tv called the deadliest catch. It is about fishing for crabs on the bering sea. Commercial fishing and this branch in particular is the most dangerous and deadly job in america. Anyway, as a person who can't chew gum and walk at the same time, falls over imaginary obstacles, hates the cold, and has almost died, I find what these guys do is amazing. I can't fathom myself doing it at all. Surprise surprise, from watching the show and listening to interviews, they are normal people like me with the same aggravations and more of them then I have. They are still amazing and their humanness makes them more so.
So I guess what I'm saying is that if something is so far out of our ken, as many unimaginative sighted people think we are, then as these fisherman are to me we are to them. Am I making sense?
I agree with you, but as BLW said, no matter how unfair it may be, a blind person who is in the public eye does sort of set the standard, because much of the public is unaware of the potential blind people have. Whereas, if you have people in your everyday life, such as your family, who've known you your entire bleeding life and still think you're mentally impaired, it doesn't, or shouldn't, matter because you're not going to change their minds.